Factitious Disorder Imposed on Another person (FDIA) is a mental illness in which a person acts as if an individual he or she is caring for has a physical or mental illness when the person is not really sick.

The parent with FDIA brings up the child so that the child cannot cope without the parent even as an adult. As an adult the child is in constant contact with the parent and still in the parents control even if this is not obvious to the outsider world. It is the constant contact that keeps the child-adult alive and coping. Even mental health professionals, doctors and the law are completely blind to this most of the time. If the parent/s have titles etc they are taken for their word and the abuse continues, it is that simple.

The adult-child is very “needy” and clings to the parent (even at a distance) because the parent is the child’s courage, confidence and coping skills. The connection is far stronger between mother and child if the mother and daughter have a lesbian relationship because the mother sexually abuses her child when she was young, it is a special bonding, “their little secret”.
The relationship between mother and daughter becomes mother and daughter and mother and lover, a far deeper trust and bonding is formed. This gives the mentally ill mother complete control over the daughter and the daughters life.

The daughter spends her whole life wondering why she cannot cope, hating herself, wishing she was stronger, and obedient to her mother to the end. Sometimes the child of the parent (often the mother) will commit suicide after the parent has died. Imagine being so controlled by someone that you would kill yourself to be with that person, this is the power of the control. This is well documented.

One of the saddest things about this is that even brothers and sisters of the victim of FDIA and close friends of the child abused by FDIA they don’t believe it happens even if they are told and they witnessed it during their lives. Any parent that controls their own child that way will have some form of mental control over the rest of the children as well. Its all about power, ego, and in the case of sexual abuse, additional pleasure for the mother
⚪
There is hope for the adult-child abused by FDIA, it means walking away from the parent to a safe haven, and no contact with the parent so that the child-adults mind can be sorted out without the interference from their parent/s. If here is contact the parents will just try to lure the adult-child back into their clutches.
○
But we, the public, we need to be more aware that such things exist and we need to be aware that the struggling adult-child may not just have mental issues and may not be stupid and clumsy at work, the reality is that they may be a victim of sick parents.
🕊️
All the best from
James M Sandbrook.