About God.

God

Billions of people world-wide claim to know God, they claim to be obedient, to have God in their lives etc, yet they don’t seem to have any real clue to who or what God is or God’s real desire for their lives.

Before I knew God I knew many strange and weird, many two-faced, many hypocrite, believers in God (Or so they say – many use the word God for personal gain etc), and I didn’t want to be a fake such as them. So when I found God I was rather scared of what I would be, who I would become, and scared of believing in a book that did nothing for my life at all.

I had a long “discussion with God” when I first found Him around 2003-2004.
I walked up and down my kitchen and told God that I was not going to be like those church going nutters that I had seen everywhere. I said that I knew beyond any doubt that God is there, but I refused to follow a God that did not do anything in my life,t hat was not active, not here in the ‘here and now” and was just a book that people adored and a pointless hope that life would be better because of Him. I wanted the Real ad Living God in my life, not some book that everyone adored, not some church that everyone adored, but the real and Living God that was loving, active, real and I could get to know.

As time went on many religious people have called me many unkind names, yet they, themselves, appear to be desperate, fake, and having no real confidence and belief in the Living God, they just adore the book about God.
I found that people who went to church prayed to God about all sorts of things, but you could hear it in their voices that they didn’t really believe in God doing anything.

As time went by many “coincidences” happened in my life, for instance when I needed to talk to someone, or when I needed to get into the dentist an opening would come up and the secretary would ring me and I would get in a day early etc. Once at the dentist I had this huge hole i my tooth and $34 in my tooth, breathing in cold air was agony and I had to walk around 5kms to get to the appointment. The dentist said that he would remove the tooth for whatever was in my pocket yet another staff member got into an argument over it saying that I should wait until I could pay the full amount. I was horrified, and the dentist overruled her, thankfully, my prayers were answered.

Having depression and fierce anxiety I was desperate and had to go to many appointments after my wife left us in much debt. Years of seclusion computer programming I was not prepared for such things and did a lot of relying on God to help get me through these appointments and later on a custody battle with the ex-wife.

Through all of this I saw things that didn’t make logical sense, yet they were the answer to my prayers, and I noted what I needed to happen. God was there, answering my prayers, but also letting me struggle to learn, and yet also teaching me that when it all went to hell, that to have faith and God would make it all right again and help get me through it.

Like the toothache, it was living hell, but God got me through it to a better end. I lost the tooth, but I also lost the intense agony, so it was acceptable and what I desperately needed, and if the cold hearted dentist woman had her way I would have suffered much longer, it would probably have driven me crazy since each breath was agony.

I realized that this was a physical world and trillions of things happen every second, so everything is not always going to go my way, so I needed to get used to that fact, so how I reacted to life, people, and not getting what I wanted had a lot to do with how I dealt with the things that didn’t go my way, and if things were real bad I got God involved and all became well, minus some bumps, etc.

I prayed to meet people that I needed to forgive, and over the next couple of weeks I met people I had not seen in years, people who had wronged me, and I got into the habit of being graceful, forgiving, nice, but also retaining the lesson so that they would never do it to me ever again. Good stuff, frees the heart and soul of hatred and brings forth good thoughts about people and trying to understand where they are coming from, and why they were so unkind and mean to me, even abusers.

I learned a lot about myself, why I was so stressed, scared of life, and how to understand why I was unconfident, depressed and suffered anxiety, from this I realised with shock that I was not a failure, but that many had failed me, and the result of the sum effort of mistreatment was a shattered frightened soul struggling through life, self hating, anxious, lacking confidence and feeling very unworthy and unloved.

Then I learned about people. I would walk into town to get groceries by myself and often sit outside and across the road from the Countdown Supermarket in the rest area at a table and watch the people coming and going, and I would study their faces. I would ask myself, “Why is she not smiling?” and say, “He looks so happy, yet so troubled, I wonder why?” It taught me that no matter what colour they were, how much money they had, what gender they were, people had the same troubles, and from this I went to greeting people with smiles, and my confidence with mingling in the public grew.
I have never been good at small talk, so I practiced this if some one talked to me. I found that God led me to situations that helped me, especially helped me help others while I was suffering, and while feeling that I was helping someone I felt needed, wanted, good, worthy, decent and good, I felt like life was not so bad.

God was bringing back the hope in me, showing me wonder, teaching me that i was not the problem of my current state but others were the reason for my suffering, and that getting back at them and society would only make others suffer as I was, so the best I could do was be the best that I could be for the healing of others and together we could all make the world a far better place for all to live in if we tried.

Years have taught me that when I pray God will make it happen if He wants it, won’t make it happen if He sees something better it he future and I must have faith in His choices, not my desires or demands, or in what I see with my limited view.

Over and over again during the years I would get a feeling to walk somewhere or to go cycling and I would come across people in need, it was far beyond what people call coincidences, because it happened far too often. Grateful to be used by God and to help others I was thrilled by thins. I helped people push cars, helped them when they were broke down, helped people with trailers, and all sorts of other occasions. It was amazing. Often I would turn up at a friends place and they would be needing help, like stacking firewood, or getting the wood out from the coming rain, or painting, fixing something up in their yard etc. All this taught me that coincidences did not exist and that God was really leading me to where I was of the most help to others according to my situation in life.

Rejected by church, the Character Assassination started, I became very active on Facebook and lo and behold, many people loved what I wrote because they said that it helped them through their daily lives.
People spoke of my posts being affirmations to prayers, answers to prayers, or advice that they needed that very day. That took a lot of getting used to, the compliments, and I went through some emotion about it all.
You see, few people ever were kind about my abilities through my life, most put me down, so here was this mass group of people saying very nice and kind things about me, I was lost for words, unsure how to react to a situation I had never been through before, frightened that they would laugh at me it he end and put me down- yet they seemed so truthful and genuine, it took some getting used to.

The Character Assassination took away many opportunities in my life. Many people shunned me, refused to talk to me, or know me. I did a lot of crying, confusion, and even disbelief that people were so weak-minded, gullible and easily led. It took a long to time accept the attacks, to adapt, to try to understand what drove Flying Monkeys and the haters, and to get on with life. It was a very hard and trying time for me and my children.
I became very disillusioned at this time and if I had seen a truck or car coming towards me at speed I doubt that I would have stepped out of the way, I was so fed up with and tired of the Character Assassination and how people had accepted the lies as truths. it was very hard to deal with and it still goes on.

Facebook helped me with my sanity. I got to help thousands of people with their suffering, and that gave me a feeling of hope, being useful, and that if I hadn’t of suffered or been born these people wouldn’t have been helped by me, so I felt much better. God was once again helping me deal with the haters in a most productive and helpful way to help heal others.

The Character Assassination is the reason that I can’t help people in my home town, so God had me help heal people all around the world instead. The blood on the hands of the Character Assassinators though, the people that I could have helped locally. I sometimes post locally on the local Facebook page, but mostly only on my own God Blessed Facebook profile and the many pages I run on social media.

The biggest unbelievers in the Living God are most church going people. They are so indoctrinated in a system that they are blind to God’s real work in their lives. And if someone comes along who really has faith in God, is guided by God etc the people of the established church refuse to believe in that person and say bad things about that person. The Divine Guidance becomes “coincidences” or something sinister in their brainwashed minds. They couldn’t see the light if God was shining it directly in their faces, because they reject all that is uncomfortable, and anything other than their indoctrination and adoration to an established religious system is uncomfortable, so they refuse to believe in the true Living God.

People put words in God’s mouth and they assume the reasons for God doing things, and if they don’t understand what God is doing they claim that it is bad or evil, they are so comfortable with the fake religious belief system in their comfort zone that anything out of the box to them is wrong, even if it is to do much good for the many.
people assume that they know what God wants, what God will, do and why. The reality is that God’s thinking is not theirs, so how can they know.

If they put faith in God, not their fears and wild imaginations, they would let God get His work done.
Many religious people wonder why bad comes into their lives, or why life is not so good yet they think that they are so obedient and follow God, it is because they are being chastised, or even so bad that God has to step out of their lives for a while and Satan kicks their butts then God has to pick up their broken bodies and souls and starts to help them all over again hoping that they will get it this time, or that they are getting in the way of God’s real work and the only way to deal with them is to give them a good smack out of the way.

God is good, God heals, God then guides us to heal others, the foolish and fakers, they don’t understand God’s guidance, even those from the church, so we just move on doing what is needed for the greater good of all.

[Unfinished]

All the best from James Martin Sandbrook.
‎Thursday, ‎29 ‎August ‎2019, ‏‎11:34:22 AM.