Years ago when I was struggling to fix up the family home due to low income I became grumpy, bitter and unsatisfied.
I got mad at God, mad at rich people, mad for the sake of being angry. After my ex-wife left the house was in bad condition and I had no money to fix it up.
I knew that there had to be some good that would come from this experience but I knew not what, so I started to search for the positives. I noted that I was always reading the advertising pamphlets which carried all the “Specials” and “Bargains” and I wanted what they were advertising, and I especially got bitter when I saw something I needed going at a good price and I had no money to get it.
I knew bitterness was not doing my children any good or my relationship with them. So I knew that I needed to sort this out soon. The bitterness was in my head and it was driving my life crazy, hurting relationships, and making me angry with God.
○
So I stopped wishing for things. I stopped praying for the many things that I prayed for. I stopped reading those pamphlets and when I saw a TV at someone’s home (By this time I stopped watching TV at home) I wouldn’t watch the advertisements. I realised that we lived in a society that was constantly consciously and subconsciously pressuring us to “Buy, Buy, Buy” and all so that the rich got more money, the banks got more money, and the government got more taxes. This was not to the consumers advantage at all.
○
I started to concentrate on what I was grateful for around my home. I was grateful for my health, my children’s health. I was glad that I got my 4 children when my ex-wife left. I was happy on the stormy days and nights to have a roof over our heads. And even though I had to walk around 5km to town to get groceries and walk home with them in a backpack and in plastic grocery bags I was happy for the food I was able to get. When I missed meals so that there was enough for my children while hungry I was happy that they were being fed. If I dressed in old second hand clothing I made sure that what they wore looked good, was tidy and that they were presentable. This made me very happy in my soul.
○
By doing this I changed my attitude around from bitterness to focusing on the good that was clearly right in front of me but bitterness stopped me from seeing the blessings and happiness right in front of me.
○
I still wanted to fix up the house and when things became available I got them and did the job required and was very grateful and happy for this. I was still wanting change, but now when good things came instead of being grumpy I felt very blessed and happy that I could do things, positive things as long as I was positively patient and did what I could when I was able to do it. This attitude improved my relationships and made my life a lot less stressful and happier.
All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
14th of September, 2016.
