Helping People grow!

Sometimes God does the clean up and old-friends and family move on. Sometimes God lets family and friends hurt us so that we can see that they are untrustworthy because we are so fooled or trusting that we cannot see the dishonesty of a family member or friend even though it is obvious to others and right in front of us.

And sometimes God demands that we choose to cut-off people because He needs to see our faith in action. he needs to know that we will do His will above the will of family and friends.

Friends and family can be an anchor that slow us down, or hold us back, and stop us from progressing forward to better things, a better life and a happier more fruitful existence.

I have been in Tokoroa for a very long time and I know thousands of people but few are my Facebook friends and yet often we talk in town and are friends in many other areas, like at work for instance, none of my work mates are friends on Facebook and yet we all get on very well. True friend status should not be judged by Facebook or how many “Likes” you get for a post on Facebook..

One of my dearest, oldest and closest friends currently lives in Australia and we are not friends on Facebook. But everytime he visits New Zealand, he always finds a way to visit me in his busy schedule and we spend an afternoon catching up, it is a great time of good fellowship.

 

And I know many people who will spend an hour or so telling me about their life, they ask for advice, or they need help and I do the best that I can for them, and I stay for some lunch etc. Some people I help them at their home, and I do odd jobs for them, but they are not my friends on Facebook.

 

I have many family that refuse to have a thing to do with me, why? I don’t know. They are allowed to choose, they have, and to me that is awesome. You see, you must understand that they choose now according to how their feelings are at this moment, understandings and opinions of how they are right now, but in 6 weeks time that could all change, so please don’t worry about it.

And family are anyway, family. We are forced to be with people that we may not like, trust or want to ever know. My father was a bad parent and was seldom, if ever, really there for me. We are not Facebook friends and he is not in any sense in my life at all. He is still who he was in the past, just older, and I am a completely new person. I have 100% no regrets that he is out of my life for good. I have forgiven him, but I cannot tolerate the person he is and the attitude that he has, so we will never get on, so why be miserable trying. I am happy not to know him any more.

 

Please don’t be offended by people’s choices, let them go. Let them live their own ways, let them go and you forget about it.

 

Oh, I do agree, that sometimes it hurts, and we wonder why? like, “What did I do wrong to deserve that?” But that is just being too sensitive and that in turn will torment us. Use common-sense and face reality. Give them to God and move on. If they will ever appreciate who wonderful you are then they will come back, if not then that is great too, they have their own journey, and God will always put good people in your life to replace them. All this is no problem to God.

And in some cases once you or I realize that it is simply a misunderstanding that the other person has to deal with, then you move on, forget it and give that person to God. This is not cold and cruel, this is common-sense.

I once went through a period of change and I lost some friends, and I prayed over this. I was so saddened and in tears, and I felt offended, hurt and unjustfully judged etc. And the answer I got back in time was that every now and then we need to do a “Real Life Friend and family Cleanup” that also includes family, and in some cases it is especially family that we need to remove from our own life. God steps in and removes friends and family from our life because they have a different journey, or we have something to do that does not include them.

 

A thought is Lotto. When someone wins Lotto they all of a sudden have all these wasteful friends who want a cut of the action, in other words they don’t care about you, they want something from you. And one marvels about all the new family that they have when they all of a sudden acquire a lot of money.

 

Remember that people come into one another’s lives for short periods of time to bless and help each other, and many (even though we don’t want them to go) have to move on to bless others. Be wise, let them go. And you go your own way. Be thankful for the good times, the lessons learned and the future people to come into your life that you can bless and they can bless you.

 

All the best from

James M Sandbrook.
2nd of December, 2014.