When we get frustrated at people we can feel that we are telling them that we have no confidence in them, and then point out what they are doing wrong and the mistakes they are making and repeating.
We do this to help them see that what they are really doing is achieving nothing.
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But people are sensitive, especially where their own lives and pride is concerned. Once their pride is offended, hurt, feel insulted (for imaginary reasons or not) etc, then a solid spiritual wall appears between you and that person.
Only the other person can take that wall down, so it leaves us powerless in many ways to reach them.
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If the upset person is egotistical, narcissist, domineering, chauvinistic etc, then the chances of breaking through that angry prideful wall is near impossible.
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Pointing out people’s mistakes very seldom works. I have seen it change people with great success, but most likely nothing is achieved. People are often more stubborn, more angry, offended after their mistakes are pointed out.
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The solution is a more amiable approach.
We need to know more about the person and why it is that they are doing things as they do. But all the best advice on the world has no value to another person if we offend he or she.
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Dale Carnegie’s book How To Make Friends and Influence People has helped people for many years, but it is a bit deceiving, worth reading though. I learned a lot about people and how to approach people who are sensitive to correction.
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All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
Wednesday, 2 March 2016, 2:30:07 PM.