Weaned from One Narcissist to Another.
Cats are normally wild animals, their natural environment is not in your house, it is out in the forests, in nature.
The mother cat has kittens in your house or under it, when the mother weans the kittens off the milk she is also weaning them off her so that they will no longer remain dependent on her for anything and in doing that they have to learn to find their own food, fight other predators, and they learn how to become survivors in the wild.
But you step in as a caring adult and feed the kittens and look after them in your house, in doing so the kittens are never weaned from their dependency and they rely on you as they relied on their cat mother, but they will rely on you (and never mature as cats) until they die. This keeps the kittens immature until they die, as they never got the real opportunity to find out what they are capable of, and they never discovered their natural abilities to hunt for food, or to live an exciting risky fun life that would make them strong willed, confident, capable adults.
What has happened is, instead of the kittens learning how to be cats and dependent on no-one, they become totally dependent on you for food, warmth, a home, company, and the total opposite from the free life of cat heaven they were born for. They settle for the easy life, but in doing so, they deny themselves a real cats life, they deny themselves independence, and also they deny themselves their true calling, to chase mice, rats, and birds, to keep the population down and to eat the dead animals keeping the earth clean and tidy and turning the carcasses back to the earth for further growth.
We do the exact same for dogs and other animals we domesticate.
When the human parent/s is a narcissist or both, they control the minds of their children, and when the children grow up the mother and father pass the adult-child over to another narcissist to marry or live with, so that the adult-child feels comforted (as a kitten), in a place where he or she is wanted, and so on, but is really surrendering their independence, life, creatively, and their personal truth to the narcissist.
I other words they become (like the kitten) a shadow of who they were born to be, submissive to their captors, and easily led until one day they wake up and all the true friends they wanted are gone, and all they have around them are liars, fakes, and abusers.
People who are brought up with narcissist parents tend to think that something is wrong, but because of their blind dedication to their own parents they feel that they must tow the line and do as their parents say, so they do.
When they leave the home they truly expect that the lover that they have found was chosen by themselves, or even by God, but the reality is that once a person has given over their life to the narcissists their life is planned for them, even marriage.
If the parents are criminals and narcissists, they cannot and will not allow their children to marry a good decent person or associate too closely with good honest people, because they may “find God” or have a sudden burst of honesty and tell their honest partner what their parent do as criminals and the parents end up in prison, shaming the family and so on.
So the mentally incapable (but seemingly capable adult children) adult-children of the criminal narcissists follow their parents guidance, because they always have, and they allow themselves to be guided into what appears to be true love, fully believing that their criminal parents have got their back. But a leopard does not change its spots as they say, and the parents with others from the criminal group use persuasion, and gentle loving parent ways, and convince their adult-children that “this is the one” for them.
The life of the adult-child never gets better and he or she struggles with depression anxieties, and struggles to cope, and this only makes them feel more grateful for their parents and their new lover, because the adult-children are lead to believe that they simply could not cope (like kittens and grown up cats) without their captors.
In the case of the Clair Case Study she was brought up by criminal parents, was seduced by criminal therapists and people supporting the criminal parents and then married off, a few times, and while she sometimes fought them, she was so used (like a cat) to being controlled and told what is best for her, that she had no courage, no ability to think or act for herself.
There was a time she fell in love with a man who for years sought her attention, faith and love, but her controllers taught her that he was evil and she believed them rather than face the struggle of becoming independent of them and making her own courageous choices. She will always wonder where love is, and she will never have love.
This kind of complete submission to her captors is so powerful that you can walk up to her, explain all the evils done to her, explain what is really going on, and show her the abuse she is suffering and what her children are going through, and she will call you a liar and run back to her captors, because their abuse has become her life, her comfort zone, they are the people who she has sold her soul to, and also (like the mother cat who brings her kittens to the house owner who feeds her) sold the soul of her children as they will be brought up by the same people who brought up Clair.
All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
22nd of November, 2021.