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Facing fears:

 Well, it’s actually not as difficult as we might imagine.

Facing our fears, and moving beyond them, can be mastered in five steps.

Let’s consider each with an example.

After earning an undergraduate degree in Anthropology, Rosie accepted a job as a research assistant at a university fossil lab, helping to prepare specimens.

She loves the work, but she doesn’t feel that she is using her full potential, especially because she isn’t allow to conduct research or teach students.

Rosie's goal is to earn a Ph.D. in Forensic Anthropology, but she is scared. Rosie knows the job openings are limited and that graduate school is difficult and expensive. She fears being unemployed and in debt.

Rosie also doesn’t want to regret having spent her career unhappy though, and lead a life dictated by fear. What to do?

Well, Rosie has already taken Step 1. Huh?

Step 1 in facing our fears involves identifying our fears – and our goals. Rosie is clear on her fears, and her goals. Why is this necessary? Well, knowing what we want, as well as what we don’t want, allows us to stay focused to pursue our goals.

Step 2 in facing our fears involves taking baby steps to build confidence. Rosie could gain teaching experience at the university to see if she wants to become an academic. If she enjoys teaching a course, she should then try teaching a different course.

Step 3 in facing our fears involves creating a self-fulfilling prophecy to ensure our success. If Rosie decides she wants to apply to graduate school after having taught some courses, she should research and apply to those Ph.D. programs that best match her interests.

For example, although she has decided on Anthropology, she shouldn’t apply to Ph.D. programs just because they are nearby or provide funding. Rosie should instead apply to those that will increase the likelihood of her success as an Anthropologist, such as schools that offer training in Forensic Anthropology, her area of interest.

Why? Because Rosie’s passion for Forensic Anthropology will sustain her during the difficult moments of stress, boredom, and frustration that are inherent in earning a doctoral degree – and will help her to engage in proactive behaviors (e.g., publishing research), which will increase her chances of landing a full-time job in the field.

Step 4 in facing our fears involves remembering to consider the source of any discouragement from others.

For example, if Rosie’s loved ones belittle her plans or abilities, she may want to consider their motives for doing so, such as resentment at not facing their own fears and/or being threatened by other people’s success.

Step 5 in facing our fears involves maintaining momentum by repeating Steps 1-5 over time.

So when Rosie is next consumed by fears, such as not finishing the Ph.D. program or not obtaining a full-time faculty position as a Forensic Anthropologist, she should acknowledge such, take another baby step in the direction of her goal (e.g., finish the article she wants to try to get published in the next few months), in order to create a self-fulfilling prophecy of success.

So, moving beyond our fears can actually help us reach our goals.

- Kristine Anthis Ph.D.

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Fear can be a great motivator at times.

One can get into action and overcome their fear by fearing something else with a stronger intensity and emotions.

An example is that one may fear losing someone so they will tackle a previous fear to get the person.

Another example: If one is at a cliff edge and the other side is about 3 feet away you probably won't attempt jump across because you are worried that

you might slip and fall to the rocks far below.

So you decide to take the long safe way around.

All of a sudden you hear a deep rumbling.

You look behind you and you see an avalanche of rocks coming your way.

The only chance of escape is jumping across the 3 foot divide  (0.9144 Meters),

so you jump,and of course you make it safely because your instant fear caused you to jump with much energy and enthusiasm.

A situation can change at a moments notice and what once was a worry or a fear simply becomes an obstacle to freedom,

or an obstacle to overcome to get what you want.

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Fear is powerful because it can cause us to avoid the things in our lives that often times don’t even exist except in our own minds.

Fear can be crippling and it can destroy our faith in many things.

Faith on the other hand is so much more powerful because it can cause us to believe in what we can’t see and it can destroy our fears that hold us back from living life fully.

When given the choice, will you answer to the voice of fear or the more powerful voice of faith?

- J. Charlestown.

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“Love is what we are born with.

Fear is what we learn. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of fear and prejudices and the acceptance of love back in our hearts.

Love is the essential reality and our purpose on earth.

To be consciously aware of it, to experience love in ourselves and others, is the meaning of life.

Meaning does not lie in things. Meaning lies in us.” - Marianne Williamson.