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A lot about life can be learned from mature understanding of what is going on around us.

Our society tends to judge us harshly, and we are often taught from a young age to fear ridicule if we fail at something.

Example:

You are with your mates and you look up to them and want to be like they are and one day you try to do some sport or something that they are doing and you make a mess of it from your inexperience and not having done it before, or maybe you are just nervous in front of  them or someone who you want to empress and they all burst into laughter because you didn’t succeed and it really hurts you emotionally.

With treatment that is considered by society today as growing up and normal we come to fear making mistakes and fearing how other people will treat us if we make a mistake. We may even treat ourselves harshly in our mind and self harm. We feel angry that we failed as an adult and may even demand of ourselves perfection and will settle for nothing other than that from ourselves putting ourselves under immense pressure to succeed.

The thing to realise that a failure is a moment in time, it is not you - you are not a failure.

You are a pioneer, an inventor, a visionary, someone having a go at something, it may work it may not, and you learn from that experience.

The important thing to remember is that when people put you down for a mistake you made or for something that did not succeed, is that they are acting immature and judgmental, while you are simply trying to do something.

When people pick at us for failure or a mistake they can knock us down a level or so in confidence, and in doing that we can stay down that low for years, self doubting, self hating even, and fearing life.
You don’t have to become hard and mean, cold and apathetic to deal with this situation - you just need to know that they have no idea what you are all about, what your past was, who you are now, so they are in no position to judge you when you and they know that they make just as many mistakes as you do.

A few times in the past people have made fun of me and tried to put me down and I know something that embarrassed them that they failed at, so I mention this event, but not harshly, in front of all the people that this person is trying to embarrass me in front of and he or she gets quiet real fast and realises that I know stuff about that person so they shut up and go away leaving me to finish what I am doing in peace.

When people laugh at you, they too know that they make just as many mistakes as you do, so please don’t let them worry you.

The sooner you put their childish reactions out of your mind the sooner you will make it and go up a step in confidence.

Failure and mistakes are simply stepping stones to success and are moments in time that help us get better at what it is that we are trying to do.

Many people have this system where they laugh with the others putting them down and taking away the bite from anyone being nasty.

I sometimes just laugh and say, “Well, better try again.” and then I try something else to see if that works.

Sometimes when I am alone I will keep trying not for the crowd but just to see if I can find a way to solve this challenge.

I find that this is good for my confidence if I see what I want to do as a challenge, a puzzle, and that makes it exciting and I am determined to find it out using my mind, body and senses.

I get a real wonderful feeling from succeeding, even if I am the only one who knows that I did it.

What counts is that I learned and grew maturity from the experience and can use what I learned in the future in some way.

It is what I take away from my efforts that counts.

And sometimes I may try again and again at something fail over and over again, but mentally pat myself on the back for trying the best that I could and see myself as a person who gives it his best shot whether he finds the answer or not.

You see, real failure that is damaging to the soul is not getting back up and trying again.

If we change our attitude from being unhappy and ashamed of failure we can then face the challenge (even while people laugh) and find a way to succeed and then quieten down all those laughing at you.

People always tend to admire a person who keeps trying because often even those laughing give up early and secretly they think very highly of you for your stubborn admirable determination to make it when they all felt that you couldn’t.

This is not about achieving goals, it is about living your life failing from time to time just like everyone else does and learning from each failure to become a person of more knowledge, and wiser from your attempts, and with courage, determination and confidence you will attack other life problems and beat them too, because now you know that the path to success is turning failure into making things work as you wanted them to do.

And please don’t let the crowd, family and friends push you around or get to you.
It is your life, your future and many of the people who you worry about laughing at you today you will not even know in ten years time.

So please, don’t worry about what others think, look after your own mind and soul by becoming the best person that you can be from your Life Experiences and the Life Lessons that you learn.

Just because everyone else is not learning like you are does not mean that you have to be like them.

Your journey in life is different, you are a thinker not a blind follower.

If you want happiness you have to be different and shine in your own light in your own way as you are, as a natural person.

The only real failure is "the failure to try".

And the measure of success is how we cope with disappointment...

...But it's also true that the person who risks nothing, does nothing; has nothing.

All we know about the future is that it will be different.

But, perhaps what we fear is that it will be the same. So, we must celebrate the changes.

Because, as someone once said "Everything will be all right in the end. And if it's not all right, then trust me, it's not yet the end."

- Evelyn. (The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel - 2011).

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